Boredom is violent

Without love

It needs more

Love can be demanded but no one has to listen

There is a man outside my door unknocking

I gave him the trigger and the reason

If I want to go outside I have to walk past him

If I want to masturbate I do so in his presence

If I want to fuck I have to embrace that he hears  goodmmmness

& now I want to stick my dick up the barrel of an assault rifle

Safety off gunpowder lubricant fingers tickle cup stock

Pull it you bitch pull it

Who is going to blow first

Choke

No good night kiss

 

broken  expectations of the  heart

 

I am in a co-dependent relationship with the army

Against my will

I cannot get out of it

They are unstable and deadly with an abusive father

I met them when I was young,

My parents introduced us

They made an impressive entrance

Dolls for boys and force

I played, became what I hated, stayed

I accept the actions of my history

So I roll over after submitting

Stomach perversions for the sake of my own fetishes

Wait for the lights to turn off

Finish myself

Bury evidence

These tissues are wasted

I flush them down the toilet like a defense mechanism

Wonder if they are searching the sewers yet

What drugs they will find there and where I can get some

MATT CLIFFORD

Advertisements